No Excuses

With so much in my plate these days, I have neglected so many things in my life. I’m drowning in the pool of work that seems endless. I have lost friendships because of my stressful life. I wonder if this will be me in the future. I have never been so self indulgent in my whole life. All I think is what is important to me. For example, today I told my boyfriend I can’t see him because I think that my computer needs me while it scans for a virus. A COMPUTER!!!!!! People I have been mad in my life but this is beyond redemption. I have gone to the point where what I see as important in life is materialistic things. I never thought it would come to this. When I have time to myself I make sure it is to me. Oh yes, I do believe in ‘me time’ but let us be serious, when I have not paid attention to the most important people in my life because of work, then I think I should cut my ‘me time’ just a little. So I want to apologies for not writing and posts lately. I have no excuse to not place time in my life for you. Sorry.

Our Roles to Act in

When looking at who we are, we find now definite word that can identify who we are. This was how I felt in high school. I lived in two worlds that contradicted each and I had to face both every day. This resulted in me creating two identities that would complement each world. Sometimes I would get lost and lose my mind in trying to solve my identity issue. However what I found more interesting was the transitional stage that took place each day. My school was in town and my home in the township, so there was forty five minutes to transform myself and try to fit in to the world that I was heading to. I took a taxi everyday and it was there that my transformation took place. When going to school I would think about work and the homework that was not done. I would think about my grades and how I could improve them. I would think of Home Economics and try to remember recipes and decor ideas that were said the day before. I would hum my music notes from my music book and allow the fat woman next to me to be unsettled by the strange harmonies. When I went home I would make myself think about my baby cousin and the songs she will be reciting for me. I would think of my grandmother constantly asking me to bring her water for her pink and blue and green and yellow pills. I would think of my uncle and wish today he will be sober and more loving. I would think of my next argument with my mother. Lastly I would think of my brother who left for varsity and remember the horrible times we had together in our younger years. And I wish those days will come back so that I could see my brother again. It was in these transformations that I was prepping for the perfect performance. Every day I built a character that would represent me and my feelings. I continually constructed myself everyday to fit the perfect role. Oh yes, there were those days that I mixed things up and found myself in trouble.
I find this exiting that I cannot pin point myself. In fact, I find it limiting to do so. What I also find intriguing is that we enter in many diverse places in South Africa and we create characters that will fit each place so that we act and live in harmony. By us allowing ourselves to live in other roles, we soon acknowledge each other better and live with many perspectives. Paul Auster would say there is not identity, but I believe there are many identities but it is up to us to claim each one and live in it. That is the South Africa I know and want to live in.

Our country. Our battle

The country I live is a place where people of strength and courage dwell. I grew up being told about the sad past my parents lived in. I grew up knowing that the world today is a product of the past that constantly follows us. With Apartheid gone and a new South Africa growing strong in its democratic principles, we are still, however, faced with hardships such as poverty. While many South Africans fought and won freedom, so many still live in poverty and are fighting everyday to survive to see tomorrow. It is issues like these in our country that make me believe that this is a country that is constantly in some battle to overcome hardship. Our strength as South Africans in not necessary in the individual. Rather it is in the masses that have a cause to fight for a better life and a better country. We cannot leave our fellow South Africans fighting alone and placing responsibility to the government. We must stand for others and show the world what our ancestors meant when they spoke about “ubuntu”. I also call upon my own generation, the youth, to see that we too have the power to bring change, just the same why our parents did in the Soweto uprisings. We too have a page to fill in the history books, a chapter that writes about a generation that fought for equality and poverty. I call for a change!!

Let's Talk Politics

Let’s get political. Today we look at our politics and wonder what went wrong. Why is Zuma in power? Who ousted the president? Who is the current president and who the hell is Malema? Well people I can assure I’m in the same boat with you. I have been looking at the news and seeing how the ANC is caught up in so much conflict and changing policies the same way they change their cars. I was not impressed to here that former President Thabo Mbeki is out and a new president has been placed in. I questioned who voted the current president in? Us the citizens, I do not think so. I just do not understand that in a democracy there are elites who have the power to remove and place in a new president without the influence of the public or parliament. I cannot see this is as democratic action. I also think that it is high time that idiots like Malema should be excluded from the ANC since he is not bringing any justice to the party. We know the reason why Mbalula talked nonsense. He had to go to an initiation school to learn manners and know how to respect his elders. Now the ANCYL is lead by fools who cannot even construct a proper argument but blabbers about anything. Surely the ANCYL is bringing a bad name for us youth. I believe that we should start questioning our current government even if we are labelled as “non –revolutionaries” (whatever that means) and voice out our opinions since it is our democratic right to do so.

A Stressed Generation

It's my first year in varsity and life has been hard. I know the meaning of stress. It's such a common word in campus nowadays. However what has stressed me more this year is the fact that we are the next generation that will lead our country. I do not believe that this country has placed such responsibility on us to lead a country filled with greatness. I look at my generation and see young faces that seem to not care much about South Africa and who can not wait to use their skills in foreign places. I'm really stressed that so many youth are pessimistic about our country. So little of us know about our history and others know vaguely. Our generation have enjoyed the fruits of democracy yet they do not know who have given us such a gift. We are so fortunate but blinded by our fortunes. It is easy to complain but difficult to fix the problems that we complain about.

I hope this country has seen the sad faces of the youth and have felt their negative attitude. We are the next generation and I think that we deserve much more investment. I also believe that our generation is blinding themselves because they vision a bleak future ahead.


I still think we as a generation should be unified in building a positive attitude that will allow us to make change rather than run away. I understand that today when it comes to leadership we just become stressed but we should allow this to makes us want to change the current situation. We did not fight in any struggle nor do we have a history about our generation, but I believe we can still do that. We can be the first generation to be build a better South Africa for all of us and the next generation after us. We can fight together against racism, sexism, xenophobia and everything that is wrong in our country today. Let us live in a South Africa built by us and never forget where we came from.

If you want to join me just comment.

Pumelela 'Push' Nqelenga

This is Me

It's about time people. I have been waiting for this moment for a long time. My family have told me many times that i must shut up and write what I say down on paper. Oh the time has arrived people and here I am writing my thoughts to you. Thank you for joining me.

Watch this space...